


Tumblr Drabble Dump

by formosus_iniquis



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Fake AH Crew, Headcanon, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-23
Updated: 2016-07-23
Packaged: 2018-07-26 03:58:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 4,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7559212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/formosus_iniquis/pseuds/formosus_iniquis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of all the stuff I put on my tumblr that wasn't long enough to post on its own</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. FAHC Meg in heels HC

Meg Turney rules the airways perched on heels as sharp as knives.

The lead anchor of the Know combats her petite size with shoes like weapons and a painted smile that is almost lethal. She is the best at what she does and she comes on air every night to remind everyone of that. Meg Turney is in the know and the smartest minds in Los Santos know better than to ask how she got that way, at least not in a voice loud enough that someone could overhear, lest she find out about it.

Meg Turney goes on dates perched on heels as sharp as knives.

She trails behind the most dangerous criminals in the city, laughing at the destruction they wrought, that she helped cause. She is still the smallest, even standing on four inch blades but a blind man could see that she is just as dangerous. Meg Turney is lethal, not just her smile, and she has several waiting to kill on her command. She has Los Santos most wanted at her beck and call: the Vagabond, Mogar, Ruby Rose, and Vav, all willing to do whatever she wants when she pouts her lips. Not that she needs them, she knows how it feels to have a man die beneath her heel. The smartest minds in Los Santos know that her grinning face is just as frightening as any psycho’s when it’s the last thing you see.

Meg Turney rules Los Santos perched on heels as sharp as knives. It would serve its citizens and its criminals to remember that.


	2. FAHC Meg Fightstarter HC

So I was watching FP in the middle of the night last night, like you do, and I can’t be the only person who heard Meg say something about shooting a guy during their tirade about bedongling things. So I don’t care who you ship fake ah crew Meg with she is a fight starter and she wants to watch the world burn.

  * “Ryan, you should shoot that guy I wanna see if all that bedazzle on his Ed Hardy will stop a bullet.”
  * “Bet you can’t hit that cyclist with your flare gun when we drive by, Gavin.”
  * “I’m going insane, Michael, let’s see what happens when we drop one of your new grenades outside of that shitty gas station.”
  * “Lindsay, I wanna take a hit out on the Ballas guy on the corner. Do I really need a reason why if we do it together?”




	3. Mavinsegwood College AU Firedrill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set in my [mavinsegwood college au](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4798700)

“Fuck,” Michael moaned, and not in a sexy way either. It was much more like the it’s 5am and the fire alarm is rather insistently alerting them that it was time to get up for the fall semester fire drill.

Ryan felt a face bury itself in his side and turned to find Meg trying to escape the sound by hiding under him, Michael looked ready to start trying her approach on Ryan’s other side, and Lindsay and Gavin were both staring into space on the outsides of the bed like it held the answer to why they were being so rudely awoken.

“What’s like the worst they can do to us if we don’t leave the room,” Lindsay asked in a voice he was just barely able to hear over the alarm.

“It’s like a fine,” Michael said.

At the same time Ryan was insisting, “It is a fire.”

“No, it’s a fire drill, Ry-bread, it’s not like they’re going to take fucking roll.”

“You and Gavin almost set a fire in the kitchen last week.”

Gavin whined, but at this point was still mostly asleep with his face now pressed into Meg’s back. “At a decent fucking hour, like considerate human beings, not at five in the goddamn morning.” Michael reminded him, like he hadn’t been the one to help them put it out

“Some people get up at five,” Ryan started to say.

“Someone make a decision, are we going or not” Lindsay insisted sounding much more awake and more annoyed than she had a few seconds ago.

“Who signed us in,” Meg asked suddenly, “cause they still have our id’s at the desk.”

Now it was Ryan’s turn to groan, he’d been the one to sign at least Meg in after work, but he was pretty sure Michael had been the one to bring Lindsay up.

Michael must have realized the same thing and he looked up at Ryan,  "Rock, paper, scissors to see who goes down?“

Meg popped upright in the bed at that, "We’ll be here all night. Ryan give me your shirt, I can’t leave the room like this.”

By the time everyone was suitably dressed to leave, they were some of the last to exit their hall, joining the end of the procession of people on the stairs to file out of the building. Despite their complaining they weren’t outside long, just long enough to find Geoff in the mass of people and for him to shout several things that would reignite the finally dwindling rumors about their relationship.

They were back in bed within fifteen minutes of leaving it, the RA’s apparently agreeing with Michaels loud complaints that no one would fucking want to sneak into their dorm at 5 in the morning and they didn’t bother to check ids to see if this was the dorm everyone belonged in, their dorm thankfully co-ed, so no one gave Meg and Lindsay a second look as they reentered. The whole experience lasting only long enough to ensure that they five of them would probably be skipping their morning classes to catch up on the sleep they had lost.


	4. LSPD Attempted Sting Operation

Imagine if you will:

The LSPD is just so sick of the Fake AH Crew just rubbing their faces in how close they can come to catching them without catching them. They know their names, their faces, and where they live but they can’t do anything about it, and Gavin broke into the office last week and covered half the officers computers with post its with little notes on them

So they set up a sting to get whatever they can from off of their computers. So the next time they stop one of the crew members, it happens to be Gavin because he got caught shitfaced coming out of one of the bars to get some fresh air while the rest of the crew was inside, so they stop and frisk him and replace his phone with one that is  _ supposed  _ to be identical in every way but once it’s in the penthouse it puts a virus on their computers. 

They already have Officer Luna trained with what to do when he goes in as their undercover IT guy, and he’s so excited for his first undercover mission. Gavin of course realizes the second he pulls his phone out again that it’s wrong, and even if he didn’t Ryan is still totally sober and noticed that Gavin’s phone is running slower than usual. It takes the crew like six seconds to figure out what happened, and then another six to figure out what they’re going to do about it.

It takes Gavin and Ryan almost no time at all to take apart the virus and reverse engineer it, because the people who are actually good with computers go into crime they don’t work with the cops. They call for IT anyway, and Detective Luna shows up so quickly they are almost certain he drove over with his siren on. They let him take some things, plans they’d decided months ago they didn’t have the attention span to make work out and heists that they realized would cost more than they would actually make in return, and in return they slip an infected phone onto the detective for him to take back to the station.

The crew’s most tech oriented members wreak havoc on the unsuspecting LSPD, they get every file they have on their computer beamed back to them and manage to shut down every piece of tech in the building. The city spends the week it takes for the LSPD to outsource someone who can undo what the crew did to their systems in flames and they learned that it it’s smarter not to try and outsmart the Fake AH Crew.


	5. Meg Centric FAHC Destruction

The city was burning.

The flames were licking at the sky and the people were screaming one name as they tried to stay out of the path of destruction, Meg Turney.

A heist gone wrong had left her family broken and bloody, inches from death, and that wouldn’t do. Meg was looking for revenge, and wouldn’t rest until the people responsible for the blood stained hospital sheets and her mascara smeared cheeks had paid dearly; most likely with their lives.

What had happened didn’t matter. A rival crew had gotten too close, the Fake AH crew had gotten burned, and they’d all walked out with new scars; but the ones Meg cared about beared the brunt of it. Every second she’d spent in a safe house she hadn’t known about before, next to a bed that should have been in a hospital instead of a room that was far too small to hold everyone trying to fit in their and the best medic that dirty money could buy, that was time she had spent planning.

She didn’t leave their bedside until she was promised that everyone would pull through with nothing more than a few new scars, scars that she would later map with feather light touches and soft kisses. Then she finally left that house she’d spent far too much time in, in gear that wasn’t hers, looking for the only thing that would finally settle her nerves, carnage. She left with Ryan’s jacket and Michael’s gun, Lindsay’s knife and Gavin’s manic grin.

They weren’t ready for her. They had plenty of time to prepare, she had lit her way to them with burnt hideouts and exploding warehouses, but there wasn’t a place in the world they could hide.

She relished the fear growing in their eyes with every step she took closer to them, how sloppy to allow themselves to be cornered like this. She was invincible, god like, as every shot fired at her missed by miles. Her slow walk toward them like on a runway, punctuated with fractured bullets and whimpered whys.

The first two died quickly, lackeys she didn’t have the time for, a clean shot between the eyes with practiced precision. The last one, the leader, he would suffer. She didn’t have to explain why she was here, and his pleas for mercy got louder as her gun clattered to the ground, they were musical but fell on deaf ears. She got in close, her target having long since run out of ammo, and made sure the last thing he heard was her voice reminding him why you didn’t cross her. “They lived, so I won’t drag this out as long as I might have.”

There was hardly enough time for the comprehension to dawn on his face before the life was draining back out of his eyes.

It was enough.

That, and the feeling of warm blood as the knife sliced through his neck. Deep enough to leave him bleeding, shallow enough so he’d be doing it for a while. She let him go, laughing for the first time as he hit the ground with a wet thud, the blood already starting to pool beneath him.

She looked better than she had in days, as she caught sight of herself in a store window. Her hair colored red once more, from the flames dancing behind her, and her lips painted the same color, from what was not entirely her lipstick.

The city was burning, and over the screams of its citizens you could hear the laughter of a woman going back to her family. A job well done.


	6. Mavinseg Highschool Power Couple

I’ve been thinking about this all day, mavinseg hs au.

Where Michael and Lindsay are  **_the_ ** power couple. On their own they aren’t the most popular or the coolest, but together they are everything. 

If you were having a party you prayed Michael and Lindsay would show up. When you were asked out you dreamed that you could be a couple like Michael and Lindsay. If you were lucky enough to sit with them at lunch you flirted with the two of them, in the hope that maybe you could hold onto their attention for more than a few seconds.

Then enters foreign exchange student Gavin and transfer student Meg. Two people who are completely unaware that Michael and Lindsay have an entire school under their spell.

Gavin and Meg form a quick bond of being the only new kids and sharing nearly all of their classes. So when they get to study hall and sit across from Michael and Lindsay they barely spare the couple a passing glance, going back to the conversation they’d been having before.

Michael and Lindsay aren’t used to being ignored, at least not when they’re together, and quickly find themselves fixated on this couple across from them. Days of being barely spoken to turn fixation into infatuation, and Michael and Lindsay find themselves doing whatever they can to get Gavin and Meg’s attention.

They’re flirting with Meg and Gavin whenever they see them. They’re inviting the two along to the best parties every weekend. They’re doing everything but bending over backward to keep Meg and Gavin’s attention and the entire school is losing their collective minds.

But it’s not like Meg and Gavin know that they’re being awkwardly courted by the school’s ‘it’ couple. Michael and Lindsay’s collective popularity is one of those things that the school knows to be universally true but doesn’t ever actually talk about.

This goes on for weeks, everyone watching as Michael and Lindsay try harder and harder to get Meg and Gavin to do more than just hang out with them. Until finally someone, someone like Ryan who hangs out with the four of them, drops the hint and enlightens the other two about what Michael and Lindsay have been doing. 

He pulls them aside and let’s them watch what Michael and Lindsay normally do when they’re at a party. Let’s them watch how Michael and Lindsay are friendly and the life of the party, as they good-naturedly turn down the come ons from other party goers and direct handsy drunks somewhere else. Let’s them watch how the party seems to revolve around Michael and Lindsay.

And suddenly things make a lot more sense when Meg and Gavin see how Michael and Lindsay’s eyes light up when the two approach the couple; how they flirt just as easily as they breathe when they talk to Meg and Gavin; it makes sense how the two new kids have gotten invited to every party that’s been held since they got to school.

There’s no marked change after the realization, there’s no fanfare, but after that party everyone knows that there’s a new school power couple. It’s Michael, Lindsay, Meg, and Gavin.


	7. Lazer Team Found Family

So I am an absolute sucker for the found family trope and Lazer Team is just perfect for that. 

Hagan and Herman would so easily fit into the role of team parents, they already bicker like an old married couple. Hagan the strict parent who tries to keep them all in line and Herman the fun one who slips underage Woody and Zach alcohol when Hagan isn’t watching. They have the kind of relationship where Herman would definitely tell Woody or Zach to “Go ask their mother,” when they had a problem he didn’t want to deal with.

Zach and Woody are barely out of their teens (19 and 20 respectively) and spending so much time together, they would easily slip into the bickering siblings role. Stealing food from each others plates, having arguments where Woody can’t help but correct Zach’s misused words, throwing pillows at the other from their bunks; all the things siblings usually do until their parents tell them to cut it out.

(And if you need a little sad in your headcanons you can think about how this could be the first real family Zach or Woody have. The  [ Speed of Fat deleted scene ](http://letmechoosetosaveyou.tumblr.com/post/138362984845/lazer-team-deleted-scene-the-speed-of-fat-for) pretty heavily implies the lack of a father figure in Zach’s life and we really don’t know that much about Woody’s life except that he was the water boy and he somehow knew Herman before all of this began. Now thanks to this team they have people that are looking out for and that care for them.)


	8. Mavinseg FAHC Role Reversal

I want a fahc role reversal au for the mavinseg crew.

Where Lindsay is the hacker, the ever present voice in everyone’s ear. She’s the one behind the camera, behind everything really, making sure her people stay safe. She’s the one making sure the security feed has been edited seamlessly so no one can place the blame on her people. The one whispering encouragement and direction as she watches from above, making sure whoever is in the action that night knows where to go. The one that doesn’t mind if she’s not on the news every night, as long as everyone gets back to her when everything’s said and done.

Where Gavin is the assassin, the ruthless killer in their midst. He’s the one with the knife, with whatever weapon he thinks would be the most fun really, taking out whoever he pleases or stands in his way. He’s the one who’s cold and calculating. The one who doesn’t care who he kills when he doesn’t know them, they don’t mean anything to him, why should he care if they die by his hand or by someone else’s a little later. He’s the one that’s warm and bubbly when the job is done, when he’s home with his people, because they’re the ones he does care about.

Where Meg is the fire starter, the one who wants to watch the world burn. She’s the one with the fuse, with the temper that’s as every changing as the timer on her explosives, starting fights or causing explosions whichever the night calls for. She’s the one who likes the feeling of a bar fight that goes her way, the one who uses the way she looks to get in a cheap punch before things really get started. She’s the one who likes the feeling of the flames at her back as the city burns, but likes the way they look reflected in her people’s eyes even more.

Where Michael is the intel, the one in the know. He’s the one with the information, who knows more than he should really, picking up new things from everyone he talks to. He’s the one setting people at ease, who gets anyone he wants talking. He’s the one with the dimple and the pretty smile who has people sharing things they wouldn’t tell their own crew, who has them feeling whatever he wants them to, as he gets what he wants out of them before letting them go. The one who wants to know everything, because that’s the best way to keep his people safe and protected in a city where information is worth its weight in gold.

Because it doesn’t really matter who’s doing what job, they’re a crew that works together unfailingly.


	9. The Thought that Counts - Turntugg Valentine's Day

Meg was not what you would call a morning person.

In fact if there was a word that meant ‘the opposite of a morning person, really just leave me to sleep if you value your life,’ that’s the kind of person Meg would be. So she wasn’t exactly happy when she was woken up on her Sunday morning, much earlier than she wanted to, by the sounds of pans clanging, cabinets slamming, and - the noise that finally got her out of bed - the smoke alarm ringing.

She was still rubbing the sleep from her eyes when she staggered out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. There she was greeted by the sight of her girlfriend in a pair of sleep pants and tank top, whispering curses at the pieces of the smoke detector she was holding in her hands and glaring at the faintly smoking pan on the stove.

Lindsay wasn’t paying attention to Meg, too wrapped up in her early morning baking to notice that she wasn’t still alone in the room. It gave Meg the chance to slip in behind her, to surprise her, something that didn’t normally happen when Lindsay was always up before her. She wrapped her arms around Lindsay’s middle, hiding her face in the space between Lindsay’s shoulder blades, her sleepy grumble serving as a morning greeting.

“G’morning to you too,” Lindsay said, always a little too chipper in the early morning for Meg’s liking, “I woke you up didn’t I?”

“A little, you’re a lot cuter than my normal alarm though.”

“Sorry,” Lindsay apologized, one hand reaching down to lay on the ones Meg had wrapped around her stomach while the other continued to work at whatever was on the stove. She turned slightly, moving so Meg could curl herself into Lindsay’s side and see what was on the stove, “Happy Valentine’s Day?”

Meg looked in the pan on the stove and saw the charred remains of what used to be a pancake, the burnt breakfast a little more black in the middle. “I tried to be fancy,” Lindsay said, Meg wasn’t sure if that was supposed to be an apology for the burnt food or an explanation for why it was ruined. “They were going to say ‘heart you’ but it turns out that pancake art is a lot harder than the internet makes it look.”

Meg tightened her grip around Lindsay’s waist so she was holding her girlfriend in a firm hug, pressing a kiss to Lindsay’s jaw as a way of saying thank you for the effort. “Happy Valentine’s Day, I love you, Linds.”

Lindsay pressed a kiss to the top of Meg’s head as she returned the hug, “Heart you, Meg.”


	10. Mavinseg fluff

“I wish I could hate you,” Michael announced to no one in particular. Not that the other three could hear him over the sounds of their own laughing.

“That’s not even a little true and you know it, Michael Jones,” Meg teased. She apparently had heard his grumbling, something that shouldn’t have come as such a surprise when she was sitting in his lap.

“We’re the best damn things to ever happen to you and you know it,” Lindsay added, sprawled across the couch so that she was laying on top of everyone at least a little bit.

“We love you too, Michael,” Gavin said, the only one of the four not currently pressed against Michael in anyway, but since he had most of Lindsay in his lap that would explain why. Michael figured that was why Gavin felt like he needed to say that, since he would usually just flop on top of Michael and make those chirping sounds of his until Michael shoved him away.

“You’re the one who was talking such big game about this earlier,” Meg reminded him, “so shut up and take your shots so we can get back to picking on you.”

Gavin and Lindsay gave twin cheers of agreement that he would have found cute or charming in any other situation, but now just made him even more sure of what he had a said before.

He gave a small wince at the burn of the alcohol after he did the shots that Lindsay had lined up earlier. “I really wish I could hate you guys,” he repeated.

“Don’t be a sore loser,” Lindsay chided, “we’re recording the next one so don’t fuck it up.”

Gav got up from the couch, shifting Lindsay from his lap, with his phone already in front of his face and Michael was sure the camera was rolling.

“We know,” Meg said as she kissed his cheek before she gave a light pat to the other, “you really wish you could hate us.”


	11. Better Sort of Bad - Mavinseg Leverage Style FAHC

Meg’s head was heavy where it laid on Michael’s chest, the thief and the mastermind lay cuddled together in their large bed listening as Gavin and Lindsay bickered over top of them.

“He bloody well was not,” the hacker insisted, “he was at least six foot and I took him out by myself!”

“Didn’t say I wasn’t proud of you Gav, you did it just like I taught you,” Lindsay said, the hitter held Meg’s hand in one hand and the other gestured theatrically as she talked to  Gavin. “All I said was he was at best 5’10” and wouldn’t weigh 150 pounds soaking wet.”

“Well he landed a solid punch on you,” he pointed out petulantly.

Lindsay scowled, her hand moving thoughtlessly to touch the blooming bruise on her jaw. “I was dealing with the real threat so Meg could do her thing and he snuck up behind me, and  you know that dickhead.”

“C’mon I think we can all agree that what really matters is that my plan fucking worked, once again, and we all kicked ass,” Michael soothed. He took Gavin’s hand in his and pulled it across his waist so he was laying down pressed along Michael’s side.

“And” Meg said, “we can all cross con a money laundering bowling alley owner off of our bucket lists.”

“And we helped Suzy get her money back, which was the point,” Michael reminded her.

“Yeah Meg,” Lindsay teased, “how could you forget we played the good guys for once?”

Meg leaned back and gave Lindsey’s thigh a teasing smack where she was curled around Meg, “We aren’t the good guys, we’re just a better sort of bad guys.”

“‘Sides, don’t know if getting a rival crew their money back from a bad investment decision really counts as playin’ the good guy.” Gavin said.

“C’mon Gavvy, this was fun, and they owe the fakes a favor now,” Michael said, turning his head just slightly so he could look his boi in the eye.

“And didn’t you have fun doing a heist with your girlfriends for once?” Meg asked, looking up at him with a heavy pout.

“Come off it, Turney, course I did.” Gavin said.

“This was a lot of fun,” Michael agreed, almost as an afterthought, he always enjoyed the times that Lindsay joined the fakes on a heist, and it was only occurring to him now that he didn’t think he’d done a job like this with Meg until now. “It something bigger than a fucking smash and grab.”

Lindsay nodded, “We’ll have to try being good again sometime.”

**Author's Note:**

> All of these were originally posted on my [tumblr](formosusiniquis.tumblr.com)


End file.
